This $979k West Bloomfield estate has ’90s mall vibes —  and it has built-in aquariums

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The Fresh Prince of West Bloomfield? New Kids on the West Bloomfield block? West Bloomfield: 48322? Someone call the Hollywood execs because this Patrick Nagel-esque estate deserves its own friggin' show/movie/celeb rehab special and we want to live here.

OK — so this custom built contemporary marvel of a 5,241 square foot, 4 bed, 4.5 bath home is ... well, we're speechless, to be honest.

So, let's do our best to describe this light-filled home, which was built in 1993 and comes fully furnished — art and all. First off, the double iron door entry opens to a duel staircase which is lined with mirrors (which, we hope you like mirrors, because this house has a lot of mirrors and other reflective surfaces).

Granite flooring spans much of the first floor, as well as the home's 3,000 square feet of additional basement space. There are soaring ceilings throughout the home, including the formal living room — which has a fireplace, mirrored pillars (we warned you!), a mirrored wet bar with a martini-etched mirror, and two built-in aquariums. Then there's a second lounge area with a mirrored fireplace with Art Deco-inspired mirror-decor as its mantel, as well as some adjacent built-in bookcase or entertainment center. The study also has massive built-in shelving units, as well as a funky desk for all your faxing needs.

The kitchen is equipped with an island, sub-zero fridge and freezers, ample storage, and a circular dining nook, and has virtually zero mirrors.

Next up? The bedrooms, including what is referred to in the description as an “owner retreat,” aka the master bedroom, which is heavily mirrored. We're talking mirrors in the entry, mirrors across and above the bed for you-know-what, mirrors lining the built-in headboard, which doubles as a frame for some original artwork that, again, comes with the home. There are spare bedrooms, too, all with ample light, and minimal mirrors — the exception being the bedroom, that has a bed frame, wall, and under-the-bed storage, and a mirror all completely built into one wall like a goddamn floating Container Store. There are walk-in closets aplenty and the granite master bath, which could be the most appropriately mirrored room in the home, and boasts a massive jacuzzi tub and a bidet. The super shiny basement is basically a second house (3,000 square feet of wide-open possibilities) and has its own kitchen.

This home is listed by Shirley Thomas of The Thousand Hills Group. The full listing can be viewed here and for a video tour of the home, click here.