Detroit Lions QB Matthew Stafford’s $6.5 million Bloomfield Hills waterfront home is still on the market — let’s take a tour

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When this massive home hit the market last year, it sent the Detroit Lions rumor mill spinning. Matthew Stafford's super-luxe 12,295-square-foot Bloomfield Hills home is still on the market but, as we now know, it's because the QB QT is looking for a gig on a team that doesn't totally suck. As of January, Stafford and the Detroit Lions have agreed to part ways. We. Are. Doomed!

Anyway, while the Lions continue to break our hearts season after season, the Stafford family estate is breaking hearts for other reasons, like that friggin' closet that appears to belong to the QB and literally wraps around, and jfc it's bigger than anything we've ever lived in. Another heartbreaking fact: we don't have $6.5 million laying around to snatch it up and turn it into the ultimate Metro Times HQ.

When Matthew and Kelly Stafford bought the gated home in 2013, they didn't have any kids. Now, the family has four little MVPs and, when the family listed the home in 2020, Stafford's wife Kelly claimed the reason for the move was to get away from drowning hazards. Or was that just a totally believeable lie because the Stafford clan knew damn well his time with our forever-struggling NFL team was coming to an end?

“Listen, I’m here, I want to be here. I love being a Detroit Lion, I love leading this team,” Stafford said in a conference following the news that their home was on the market last year. “All that kind of stuff is just out there to be out there. It's a slow news month at that point and I’m just happy to be where I am and ready to deal with this offseason the way that it is and try to make the best of the season that I hope happens.” Well, that went to shit.

OK — back to the house.

The home features 5 bedrooms, 5 full baths, and 2 half baths, as well as 441 feet of lake frontage. Cool. Also cool? The temperature-controlled wine cellar, the glass elevator with access to all three floors, floor to ceiling windows, a two-story foyer, granite floors, a gourmet kitchen, a marble master bath, a coffee bar (um, excuse me?), a hot/cold plunge bath, sauna, steam room, and the listing claims the Stafford home comes with the largest infinity pool in all of Michigan. Oh, we forgot to mention the home's indoor half basketball court with Detroit Piston's flooring from back when they called Pontiac's Silverdome home.

This home is listed by Jeff Barker of Max Broock Realtors.